tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74503812779800902182024-02-07T05:00:19.606-08:00Misanthropic Muse's MusingsJust simply the mere musings of a java-addicted, dark-gothic-geek who is misanthropic individual to cause waves of inspirational reality voiced musings.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-42070084108190795222012-01-20T21:23:00.001-08:002012-01-20T21:23:27.495-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiF3cSFcuDr7VnNOwo-I_8Axuj1TRaXe65c57JOQAb8H9A7IKXb1Z9y6z6sa59YrPxi8Hcvv-8QIL_52tyOTgBe_ssiKayZfM-BZcGlhxAHiUZS9PzSkzuJ4cd4GzBuVeeQkAEmcdQ8G_w/s1600/SDC12389.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="320" width="234" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiF3cSFcuDr7VnNOwo-I_8Axuj1TRaXe65c57JOQAb8H9A7IKXb1Z9y6z6sa59YrPxi8Hcvv-8QIL_52tyOTgBe_ssiKayZfM-BZcGlhxAHiUZS9PzSkzuJ4cd4GzBuVeeQkAEmcdQ8G_w/s320/SDC12389.JPG" /></a></div>
<b>Why so serious?</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-60126313942970810882012-01-20T16:35:00.001-08:002012-01-20T16:35:27.429-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTygGBtorpTpgZ2cK-uRmhSmwYe3R52yXSL6acSaF0alGOFIPKNRDEMeZK-MSB76Vu9laxaqdQC9YkDIe9uGzTgAyKcFxZoJKMTsABSu7iHHU8V7jeCUkdgdN0W9UeL7mYNkC3JTRGbj0/s1600/SDC12371.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTygGBtorpTpgZ2cK-uRmhSmwYe3R52yXSL6acSaF0alGOFIPKNRDEMeZK-MSB76Vu9laxaqdQC9YkDIe9uGzTgAyKcFxZoJKMTsABSu7iHHU8V7jeCUkdgdN0W9UeL7mYNkC3JTRGbj0/s320/SDC12371.JPG" /></a></div>
<b>Why do I have a picture of myself up? Just to say I feel very good about myself lately (regardless of the countless hours of no sleep, and taking care of children). My husband makes me feel wanted and needed every day. With his constant complimenting, and guidance, he has been helping me see that I AM attractive, sexy, and his only desire.
Not too bad for 38 years old ;) LOL</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-9203722660726439382012-01-20T11:02:00.001-08:002012-01-20T11:02:49.092-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUuEE_wG-Yv5PPRKo8iCEz8TxBxejTHp40B8oZ0P0eo9GBmJdKVtzI6OmD5B6s-ME8obZqwgZuPgSYoMIzLNwXA0a_erdzJ3DDU8Q21FHTuI2ILGZQ4GIdX9pGZlWadfPmrxof4BUpcwA/s1600/2011-01-22+16.07.05.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUuEE_wG-Yv5PPRKo8iCEz8TxBxejTHp40B8oZ0P0eo9GBmJdKVtzI6OmD5B6s-ME8obZqwgZuPgSYoMIzLNwXA0a_erdzJ3DDU8Q21FHTuI2ILGZQ4GIdX9pGZlWadfPmrxof4BUpcwA/s320/2011-01-22+16.07.05.jpg" /></a></div>
<b>Taken last year in Logan, UT.</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-66525360390031429642012-01-20T10:55:00.000-08:002012-01-20T10:55:17.474-08:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1l6fW6RI1s9kkgSOMtNqRBzQtBHbpDNDrE6X3OmFSVxuxIsliQICWj8POMVaRWSTJw_s02gyEKsinrs-t4LsJNHiUbFmyP07Z_4-jzKgRp5mjKyMHH-mBOGJiW4OrdTXdAmYbbQnN1e8/s1600/2011-01-22+16.06.22.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="239" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1l6fW6RI1s9kkgSOMtNqRBzQtBHbpDNDrE6X3OmFSVxuxIsliQICWj8POMVaRWSTJw_s02gyEKsinrs-t4LsJNHiUbFmyP07Z_4-jzKgRp5mjKyMHH-mBOGJiW4OrdTXdAmYbbQnN1e8/s320/2011-01-22+16.06.22.jpg" /></a></div>
<b>This was taken last year in Logan, UT. I find that nature provides the best ambiance for photography (and people as well). I will be posting more photography.</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-14090917329149515842012-01-12T09:54:00.000-08:002012-01-12T09:54:24.047-08:00ChangesNow the holidays are officially gone and "put away", I have decided that this is the time to start cleaning and revamping things and get things rolling. I have found that each year has become much better each time. In hopes, we will be searching for a bigger place by another month or so. I just wanted to "touch up" on the current events...
We're still all getting adjusted to the new baby (Lucian) with his "unique" sleeping schedule. Hopefully by the time he's a month old, it'll all smooth out. He's getting so big at a fast rate. His last check-up was excellent, which eases my mind (okay, maybe just a little bit).
My daughter is still currently healing over the tragic news from over the holidays. I just wish I could reach out more to see what I can do as her mother, but, I know she has to step up and choose to communicate. I cannot pressure her. I am hopeful though that she will heal in time, and also realize and accept that none of it was her fault <b>AT ALL<i></i></b>.
I've noticed huge changes even within a short amount of time. I'm on my break from school for the semester, will be returning in March, and I have found I actually (well, it does get taken by the baby) I have some free time even if it's at nights which I spend a lot of quality time with the family and am able to squeeze in a few hours of one on one time with my husband. That man has changed my life, I swear. I use to have this jaded outlook on "settling down", being with the "one" for the rest of my life, etc when it came to relationships and any hopes of marriage. Furthermore, I had no hopes of ever having anymore children. My husband did change all that, and our family has grown and it's such a beautiful and wonderful thing.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-62455202236324975112012-01-06T10:11:00.000-08:002012-01-06T10:11:29.081-08:00I once again will state this...I will <b>NEVER</b> understand people (I am stating this about <i>"supposedly"</i> grown and mature adults). I have to learn information 3rd hand, and no one has the maturity to at least inform me or anyone else involved about something pretty important.
Yes, it makes me angry and yes it makes me very upset because these things have been laid on my plate and I had to become the bearer of bad news.
All I can say at this point is WTF...grow a set, find a spine and freaking just be mature enough to let me know. Again having to find things 3rd hand (I don't even state 2nd hand anymore because that's how the situation has been), finding the obituary set and I found this myself. Furthermore, I see I am stated in said article plus my daughter. Someone could of taken the time to say this information to me, bad enough, I had to break this to my daughter. I would of thought and hoped they would of taken the time to inform her or <b>SOMETHING<i></i></b>.
So my faith in people for being at least somewhat trying to be honest and upfront has been diminished and it slowly being faded away. It's no wonder, I sit back and realize why I do <b>NOT<i></i></b> have any trust issues with people outside my family/close friends.
Perhaps my view(s) will become more positive later in life, but right now, my task at hand is to make sure my daughter heals in time and hopefully realize she had nothing to do with this, however, deep down I feel that those who could not have been honest and at least contact her, they can take the time to grow up and realize the damage that has been set in on this.
I honestly can say, <b>NO ONE</b> can undo the damage, NO ONE can assist in her healing <b>EXCEPT ME</b>. I have taken responsibility for her and it is a life long dedication. Take it as you will as it being selfish, but I have been the one for years to be there for her. <b>NO ONE CAN CHANGE THAT. NO ONE.<i></i></b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-49222318543738143732012-01-03T12:31:00.000-08:002012-01-03T15:54:43.338-08:00Unspoken words<span style="font-style:italic;">I have decided to use my Blogspot more often, more so for a personal blog page.</span><br /><br />On December 25, 2011, I had received news of my ex-husband (my daughter's father) had passed away of a heart attack. It was very shocking. I have literally taken a step back and am still finding it mind blowing. I have learned over the years to let things go, and do not carry a grudge of over things that have happened long past. <br /><br />Regardless of whatever that has happened, I find it the most best time to put things aside and let all things go. There has been a frustrating point now, I had anticipated some sort of word from his family members, at least for my daughter's sake. No word on anything from anyone from the family, not even to her. I had received all this news from a close friend, and just recently I had broke the news to my daughter.<br /><br />I can understand if his family members have angst against me. My feelings on this is, fine, feel free, it is your right, but don't punish her for it (my daughter). I don't feel it's right and it's down right cruel and frustrating when people can't even take 2 seconds to keep her in mind. She was his daughter, did they forget this?<br /><br />I do hope that perhaps they can keep her in mind and perhaps keep in contact with her, if not, then all I can do is be there for her as always.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-84648987505499263772011-03-18T20:46:00.001-07:002011-03-18T20:46:41.722-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-snc4/195773_172651882786758_5539248_n.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 347px;" src="http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile-ak-snc4/195773_172651882786758_5539248_n.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-2341298417682310182011-03-17T17:29:00.000-07:002011-03-17T17:30:39.735-07:00War with oneself<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://fineartamerica.com/images-medium/frustration-grady-zeeman.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 340px; height: 700px;" src="http://fineartamerica.com/images-medium/frustration-grady-zeeman.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">I’ve hit a point in my lifetime now, realizing that I can’t do the same work as I use to. I hate what my body is doing to me, and it makes me hate it even more so hateful, it prevents me to even enjoy one simple damn day. <br /><br />It’s like the day passes by me and I’m absolutely standing still. I’ll never understand why do I feel so extremely down (about myself) right now. I truly wish I could be able to do what I use to, then those nasty thoughts stir inside my head and reminds me how much my body hates me and continues it’s tirade against me, and my hatred for it as well.<br /><br />There have been times now I feel like shutting myself away from the entire world, and battling this war against my body alone. But, I have quite a few reminders why I do not and I reflect on why I cannot work like I use to. It’s been a raging war inside of me, and I want rid of it.<br /><br />My only solace lately has been my children, my husband, parents, and close friends. I certainly hope to win this war and continue onto life with a much more clearer insight and happiness (with myself).</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-66516800608233352962011-03-17T13:45:00.001-07:002011-03-17T13:45:39.309-07:00Imagine Away<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_li7yw4ihBj1qbajn2o1_500.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 450px; height: 298px;" src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_li7yw4ihBj1qbajn2o1_500.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">I can imagine…I can imagine, living in a semi-desolate area with my family. Away from the course, cold, and cruel realities of the populated world. I would rather face the true aspects of nature. <br /><br />I can imagine…I can imagine, stepping out unto the porch and seeing a picturesque view of the rigid cold, yet so beautiful sight of nature, beckoning me to be part of it.<br /><br />One day, we will be there…one day.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-10811002717303621902011-03-17T09:26:00.000-07:002011-03-17T09:28:21.607-07:00American Pride & Prejudice - This Show Sucks<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/188951_170843946298330_100001181772196_355676_6273387_n.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 619px; height: 458px;" src="http://a3.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/188951_170843946298330_100001181772196_355676_6273387_n.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">COME TO THIS SHOW SUCKS LIVE ON:<br /><a href="http://www.blogtalkradio.com/afallenmind"></a></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-51659809987567112882011-02-10T15:31:00.000-08:002011-02-10T15:34:02.185-08:00Tomorrow on "This Show Sucks"...<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/180752_153572181364954_100001365196700_269500_1147319_n.jpg"><b><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 619px; height: 458px;" src="http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/180752_153572181364954_100001365196700_269500_1147319_n.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></b></a><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 11px; line-height: 15px;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; line-height: 15px; "><b><br /></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 15px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>February 11...LIVE...! Chat, Discussion, And Just FUN FUN FUN</b>!</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 15px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" ><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); line-height: 15px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" ><a href="http://www.blogtalkradio.com/afallenmind"><b>http://www.blogtalkradio.com/afallenmind</b></a></span></span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-66923855972148042752011-02-10T15:02:00.000-08:002011-02-10T15:08:28.783-08:00SKLM's Movie Pick for the Night: Seventh Moon<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://moviesoftheday.com/upload/covers/382055/seventh-moon-cover-3.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 520px; height: 677px;" src="http://moviesoftheday.com/upload/covers/382055/seventh-moon-cover-3.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><b><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal; "><b>I have chosen the movie: "Seventh Moon" due to seeing the trailer for this. The origin is very fascinating to me so will be watching this with dinner. I will provide my feedback regarding this movie tomorrow.</b></span></div></b><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Synopsis:</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1052040/">http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1052040/</a></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" ><i>Melissa and Yul, Americans honeymooning in China, come across the exotic 'Hungry Ghost' festival. When night falls, the couple end up in a remote village, and soon realize the legend is all too real. Plunged into an ancient custom they cannot comprehend, the couple must find a way to survive the night of the Seventh Moon. </i></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; "><span class="Apple-style-span" ><i><br /></i></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px;"><i><iframe title="YouTube video player" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/5-KKxNRhIJM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen=""></iframe></i></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px;"><i><br /></i></span></span></div></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-81537182572848403812011-02-09T09:15:00.000-08:002011-02-09T09:17:31.714-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgha4TlyzwKetkIAd6Nhr-jR8JmUqsyXZdwRmVhvx-sj0K68T1Xdu6B1FbvPoKz14Vl1vMXS-DaYrH0nLY5Fwtoi9qCUNPlPqywl0wTJCgDVM6yx72_q7c9Fl5Q697nZfy6uMvCQbENrVY/s1600/2_9_show.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 237px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgha4TlyzwKetkIAd6Nhr-jR8JmUqsyXZdwRmVhvx-sj0K68T1Xdu6B1FbvPoKz14Vl1vMXS-DaYrH0nLY5Fwtoi9qCUNPlPqywl0wTJCgDVM6yx72_q7c9Fl5Q697nZfy6uMvCQbENrVY/s320/2_9_show.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5571739959812888610" /></a><br /><span style="font-weight:bold;">This Friday on www.blogtalkradio.com/afallenmind @ 9pm pacific<br /><br />http://www.blogtalkradio.com/afallenmind/2011/02/12/love-or-lust-instant-gratification-vs-the-tried-true</span><div><b><br /></b></div><div><b><br /></b></div><div><span></span><b>Come on in this Friday, chat a bit, listen and gain new information, and call in.<br /></b><br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-57940649231901680392011-02-06T11:37:00.000-08:002011-02-06T11:41:05.658-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://mystuffspace.com/graphic/prod_227_5909.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 303px; height: 329px;" src="http://mystuffspace.com/graphic/prod_227_5909.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><center><span style="font-weight:bold;">Hey Diddle Diddle...<br />so much you fiddle<br />Adjusting, fidgeting, never resting<br />Are you testing...<br />How far long you may go<br />Diddling too and fro?<br /><br />Hey Diddle Diddle<br />Quit messing with your fiddle.<br /></span></center>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-880942645315124912011-02-06T11:24:00.000-08:002011-02-06T11:37:00.550-08:00"Cunt"<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh639Jt4qgVTgLi7On6tUFLhvV0duL-o5Lsw_nbdm08dRURtkDDrVsDGNAKmWid5aCdPnuPPqVs86DvyOlDKii8uvUe_D96xIi4qDRnR4pAJca-A_goqFMfJ9dNyjSMFGLqq5_IIpcpWPQ/s1600/cunt.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh639Jt4qgVTgLi7On6tUFLhvV0duL-o5Lsw_nbdm08dRURtkDDrVsDGNAKmWid5aCdPnuPPqVs86DvyOlDKii8uvUe_D96xIi4qDRnR4pAJca-A_goqFMfJ9dNyjSMFGLqq5_IIpcpWPQ/s320/cunt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5570662003086871522" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />Lack of warmth and humility<br />It still has become something of somewhat stability.<br />Is there real love within the walls?<br />What refuge do we truly seek and why does it call?<br />The word in itself has been banned oh, so many times.<br />Some women making it sound like such a heinous crime<br />Even for stating it<br />Hence throwing the fits...<br />It is a word<br />And for any individual throwing a temper tantrum, that's absurd.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-31973587790566788062010-03-18T16:59:00.000-07:002010-03-18T17:06:12.045-07:00Realism...Continued<span style="font-weight:bold;">Returning to the subject at hand from yesterday's entry...<br /><br />I have noticed that this certain person has been trying their very best in attempting to create themselves as a priority (perhaps even a first priority) in my life. Unfortunate for her, I will not (or ever) allow this. <br /><br />I'm a recent "new" mother per say. I just had a baby a month ago (I have a teenager daughter as well). I have my set priorities in life. I have my goals in life. None of these things do NOT include this person. However, here very soon, she will learn her lesson the hard way because she will receive that "slap of reality" from me tomorrow as she claims she wants to call me and talk.<br /><br />I truly do not have any time for someone else's (quite bluntly) bullshit. I have too many things on my plate to even blink an eye at someone's drama, bitch, whining, etc. I won't and will never have it.<br /><br />This is the same person that has placed me as the status of "best friend" but has also created me as an option if things don't go her way, if she needs/wants something, etc.<br /><br />Never be an "option" in someone's life. Be there, yes, for your friends. Be there for your family...but if that person has only created you in their life as an option and only depend on you whenever only THEY need something...<br /><br />They do deserve that bitch slap back onto realism. Period.<br /><br />...More realism points tomorrow.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-14484776627372856582010-03-17T17:06:00.000-07:002010-03-17T17:19:17.560-07:00Realism<span style="font-weight:bold;">Some people in this world just need a good reminder what realism is. Some people need that swift smack alongside their thick skulls to be once again reminded the true reality that is out there in the world...<br /><br />Then perhaps there are some that really and truly don't understand and get it.<br /><br />It's unfortunate that there are some people that don't truly understand the real meaning of friendship, loyalty, compassion and just downright using their brain when it comes to the absolute obvious. I'm sure there are many out there that have logical brains and common sense to fully understand and comprehend this...I know a few myself.<br /><br />Perhaps this will be a never ending cycle for certain types of people. <br /><br />...this will be continued further very soon.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-32425809258414218542010-03-10T20:26:00.000-08:002010-03-10T20:34:39.172-08:00Winds of Change<span style="font-weight:bold;">I thought it would be beneficial to finally redo and upkeep this blog. I find it a bit more therapeutic to write out my frustrations, triumphs and other such wonderful things that happen in my life.<br /><br />I have found a few interesting things that are needed for such change. As much deep down it stabs at me to do so, but I will be walking away from a burning travesty of a friendship that was built within over a 10 year time span due to lying, no attempts in paying off a debt with me, and amongst many other reasons. The change however will do me good, for which I have noticed the great change in this person ever since I knew I was pregnant and had my baby. All I can state at this moment in time, it was her loss, not mine. <br /><br />The other change is our future (possibly very soon by the summer)move to Utah. I am very much looking forward to this. I am at a very happy place in my life finally and it is going to be my most biggest goal to keep this family happy and together. <br /><br />I will be writing more so in the near future. This is only a small insert upon what is going on in my life...and lift the weight off of my chest and shoulders that have been there for so long.<br /><br /><br /></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-76952736781963289062009-08-07T04:33:00.001-07:002009-08-07T04:42:22.424-07:00Long Time<span style="font-weight:bold;">It's been quite awhile since the last blog posting; so long I completely had forgotten I had this.<br><br>There has been a lot of changes in my life as of recent, I had moved to Washington state to take care of my father then taking an opportunity to starting fresh in St Louis.<br>I feel that this was one of the best choices I have made.<br>I am still needing to get the money together for a divorce since things did not pan out with the ex.<br>There are many reasons upon that, I won't get into, but knowing I'm sure I'm seen as "the bad person" in all of this.<br>I'm happy for once in my life. I have a beautiful daughter that is soon to be a teenager (yes, very scary thing to think about), have a WONDERFUL man in my life that actually genuinely loves and cares about us, and I am nearing 13 weeks pregnant.<br>My body is constantly going through changes and I have experienced some pains, but I am looking forward to all of this.<br>My daughter has fully accepted this and is looking forward in being a big sister.<br>Austin has been beaming ever since the pregnancy results and has been having me at home to do online school only. He's been an extremely loving and supportive man.<br>He has also wanted to create the right ambiance to ask me to marry him.<br>I know I'll be leaving a marriage (by legal means) and enter another one, but when you feel something is right, then go for it.<br><br>I'll be keeping this Blogger up to date as much as possible, since there isn't much else to do during the day.<br></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-43121922256091954142008-07-25T10:56:00.001-07:002008-07-25T11:05:31.030-07:00@ Work Thoughts of the Day<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://dl10.glitter-graphics.net/pub/364/364200kmy608pqwb.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px;" src="http://dl10.glitter-graphics.net/pub/364/364200kmy608pqwb.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://dl5.glitter-graphics.net/pub/608/608475l1tc5mmoqi.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px;" src="http://dl5.glitter-graphics.net/pub/608/608475l1tc5mmoqi.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />Counting down the minutes, seconds, milliseconds until lunch, it has become known that I am highly antsy. The urge and desire of going outside to enjoy that cancer stick.<br /><br />I suppose I can wait another half hour...I hope.<br /><br />Work has become slow today (usually on a Friday) and I am going to go insane.<br /><br />...GIVE ME SOMETHING TO DO!!!...<br /><br />Emails and chats are just at a bare minimum, so I save what I can, but gee doesn't go with the course, the more work you have the more job security you have.<br /><br />::Gulp::<br /><br />Me, worried? Not really...I have a few prospects I have been investigating on, which may work out.<br /><br />Okay I think I'm done, time to go crazy.<br /><br />Yay, anti-depressants...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-54901561190760539112008-07-25T10:48:00.000-07:002008-07-25T10:55:27.496-07:00Misanthropic Muse's Mood of the Day<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family:Verdana;font-size:180%;"><span style="font-size:85%;"><span style="font-family: georgia;font-size:130%;" ><b>"American Idiot"</b></span><br /><br /><center><img src="http://dl9.glitter-graphics.net/pub/453/453599u4q4pu7vzs.jpg"></center><br /><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;">Don't want to be an American idiot.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Don't want a nation under the new mania</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> And can you hear the sound of hysteria?</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> The subliminal mind fuck America.</span><br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Welcome to a new kind of tension.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> All across the alien nation.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Where everything isn't meant to be okay.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Television dreams of tomorrow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> We're not the ones who're meant to follow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> For that's enough to argue.</span><br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Well maybe I'm the faggot America.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> I'm not a part of a redneck agenda.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Now everybody do the propaganda.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> And sing along to the age of paranoia.</span><br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Welcome to a new kind of tension.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> All across the alien nation.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Where everything isn't meant to be okay.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Television dreams of tomorrow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> We're not the ones who're meant to follow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> For that's enough to argue.</span><br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Don't want to be an American idiot.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> One nation controlled by the media.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Information age of hysteria.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> It's calling out to idiot America.</span><br /> <br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Welcome to a new kind of tension.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> All across the alien nation.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Where everything isn't meant to be okay.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> Television dreams of tomorrow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> We're not the ones who're meant to follow.</span><br /><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"> For that's enough to argue.<br /><br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/M5mjN32G1iI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/M5mjN32G1iI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br /></span><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: times new roman; font-weight: bold;">Dedicated to those who are the ones that drive individuals like me to have to take pills.</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; color: rgb(255, 0, 0); font-family: trebuchet ms;"><br /></span></span></span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7450381277980090218.post-1443735375233821992008-05-23T01:10:00.000-07:002008-05-23T01:16:05.130-07:00Destruction of One's Heart<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3J4gvselrlUTWcDgpOFwR2i7vq9dq91p10uF30rkPoDTSQrmFpJFjboSVA9D5Y_oInqTvpXV2F4b26SlH7kpbsu9mjk01mJ-3flWIotfCzDihB3oC98cvoCnUyagEgnaC6kubNmwgxbM/s1600-h/within-temptation-the_heart_of_everything.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3J4gvselrlUTWcDgpOFwR2i7vq9dq91p10uF30rkPoDTSQrmFpJFjboSVA9D5Y_oInqTvpXV2F4b26SlH7kpbsu9mjk01mJ-3flWIotfCzDihB3oC98cvoCnUyagEgnaC6kubNmwgxbM/s320/within-temptation-the_heart_of_everything.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5203484028381453122" border="0" /></a><br /><div style="text-align: center; color: rgb(255, 255, 255);font-family:lucida grande;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="font-weight: bold;">I just had to get this off my chest, due to recent events...I will be reverting into a more hermit like state for a bit, releasing the negativies through my art and writing)</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;"> <br /><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Destruction of One's Heart<br /><br /></span>Your words of hate and despisement<br />Bring nothing but despair and torment<br />Why as I ask<br />You feel this the task<br />Of your waking moment and waking hour<br />Attempting for me to cower<br />At your mere existence<br />Your anger become more when I have the defensive stance<br />Your words become more and more hurtful<br />I close my eyes and hope it will just all dull<br />Erased from existence within my mind<br />Since your distaste in my being isn't so kind.<br />You are my reference point of life<br />Yet only within your striking you bring only strife<br />You are my mother I thought be true<br />Only having hatred submitted from you<br />Only love me for who I am for today, tomorrow, forever...<br />Will you accept your daughter, or I am to become in your life a blur?<br /><br />(C)2008 Misanthropic-Musings<br /><br />(*Dedicated to my mother for whom has slashed and cut into me recently...for whom I will always love yet always fear of never being loved.*)<br /><br /><br /><br /><object type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="never" allownetworking="internal" data="http://www.youtube.com/v/YXQHZEGpvy0&hl=en" height="355" width="425"> <param name="allowScriptAccess" value="never"> <param name="allowNetworking" value="internal"> <param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YXQHZEGpvy0&hl=en"> </object></span></span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12824187029507652888noreply@blogger.com0